Weaning

Understanding the Process—Physically and Emotionally

Did you know the global average age for weaning is around 5 years old? While this is uncommon in the United States, both the American Academy of Pediatrics and the World Health Organization recommend exclusive breastfeeding for the first six months, followed by continued breastfeeding along with complementary foods through at least age 2.

Ultimately, the decision of when to wean is a personal one—between mother and baby. Sometimes weaning is initiated by the mother, and other times it happens naturally through baby-led (self) weaning. Whenever possible, gradual weaning is ideal. Slowly reducing feeds over time helps your body adjust, minimizing both breast discomfort and the risk of hormonal shifts, particularly related to oxytocin levels.

Oxytocin, often called the “feel-good hormone,” is released during breastfeeding and skin-to-skin contact. A sudden drop in oxytocin—such as from abrupt weaning—can sometimes trigger what's known as weaning-related depression. Mothers may feel unexpected sadness, irritability, or emotional overwhelm. If these symptoms last longer than one to two weeks, milkGEN strongly encourages you to reach out to your OB/Gyn or healthcare provider for evaluation and support.​

​

How to Wean Gradually

When you’re ready to begin the weaning process, here are some practical steps to guide you:

​

Breastmilk alternative:

If you are weaning before your baby’s first birthday, it’s important to replace breast milk with infant formula to ensure your baby continues to receive the necessary nutrients for healthy growth and development. Be sure to discuss your baby’s individual daily intake needs and which formula brand to choose with your pediatrician.

​

If nursing:
You can begin by gently reducing stimulation. One method is to apply light fingertip pressure to the breast while your baby is latching—this helps limit milk flow and gradually decreases demand. Over time, skip one feeding every few days, allowing your milk supply to adjust slowly and comfortably.

​

If exclusively pumping:
Start by shortening each pump session slightly, and then begin to remove one session per day every few days. The goal is to reduce overall stimulation and output gradually. If your breasts become engorged or uncomfortably full, you may need to pump just enough to relieve pressure—this helps prevent clogged ducts, mastitis, and unnecessary discomfort, without signaling your body to make more milk.

Weaning is more than a physical transition—it's often an emotional one, too. Whether it happens gradually or sooner than expected, your feelings are valid. Support is available at every stage. If you're considering weaning or are struggling with the process, a lactation consultant can provide personalized guidance to help you feel confident and supported.

​

Let's Talk About DMER

While we’re on the subject of milk and mood, it’s important to be aware of a rare condition called Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex (DMER). DMER is characterized by sudden, intense waves of negative emotions—such as sadness, anxiety, irritation, or even nausea—that occur just before or during letdown. It's believed to be triggered by a rapid drop in dopamine. These feelings typically last only a few minutes but can be deeply distressing. Though rare, DMER can occur with every feeding or pumping session, and in some cases, may influence a mother’s decision to wean.

There are also rare reports of the opposite: intense feelings of pleasure or arousal during feeding, which can be equally confusing and difficult to process.

If you suspect you’re experiencing DMER or emotional distress during feeding, you are not alone—and you're not doing anything wrong. Support and medical guidance can make a big difference. Please schedule an appointment with your lactation consultant and medical provider if you are experiencing DMER or any other mood disorders.